3MO pravidla
3MO PRAVIDLA:
1. Buď pravý
2. Buď homosexuál
3. Když nejsi homosexuál, buď bisexuál
4. Když nejsi ani jedno, předstírej to
5. Používej oční linky
6. Používej oční stíny
7. Obarvi se na černo
8. Obarvi se na blond (platinová nebo co nejvíc světlá)
9. Můžeš to i kombinovat - růžová, červená, fialová
10. Musíš mít ofinu, která ti sahá nejmíň do půlky tváře
11. Stále se tvař smutně
12. Když jdeš po ulici, koukej do země
13. Plač při každé možnosti za všech okolností (co nejvíc)
14. Nos proužkované ponožky
15. Mikiny jsou povoleny jenom s kapucí (černé, růžové, proužkované)
16. Kup si alespoň jedno tričko s Jackem Skellingtonem a tvař se, že je to tvůj největší idol
17. Snaž se vypadat co nejvíc americky
18. Dej si piercing na následující místa: dolní ret (obě strany), nos, obočí, bradavka, pupek... nejlepší je, když ho budeš mít všude, ale když ti to rodiče nedovolí, dej si alespoň rty. Když ti budou nadávat, vyjádři svoje pocity... viz 13.
19. Doma se večer namaluj a obleč a nafoť minimálně 60 fotek v koupelně tak, aby za tebou byla vidět záchodová mísa a na stěnách by měly být kachličky (ne sádrokarton). Musíš se fotit sám. Potom všechny uveřejni na VampireFreaks nebo MySpace
20. Minimálně na 5 fotkách předstírej, že pláčeš
21. Mladší sestře seber všechna její trička a nos je pravidelně ven
22. Obuté můžeš mít jen číny, nebo skejtové boty. Nejlepší je, když máš růžové Conversky. Děvčata mají při teplotě nad 28°C povolené žabky (černé, řůžové, červené nebo proužkované)
23. Děvčata musejí mít na hlavě plastovou nebo látkovou čelenku, mašli z umělé hmoty nebo nějáké dětské sponky
24. Vždy je potřeba mít jeden gel, tužidlo a lak na vlasy vždy v zásobě
25. Váš nick kdekoliv musí obsahovat Emo (např: emoGIRL, emoBOY, e.m.oKid atd. atd. atd...)
26. Používej emo gramatiku když si píšeš na chatu nebo kdekoliv
27. Místo J piš Y
28. Místo V piš W
29. Místo CO piš CWO
30. Za každým T piš H, i když to nedává smysl nebo se to nehodí
31. Místo CH piš X
32. Tvař se, že tak píšeš odjakživa
33. Vytvoř si blog, který bude jen o Emo
34. Zveřejni na něm fotky cizích kluků a dívek stažených z VF
35. Nos trička a mikiny značky Hurley
36. Místo ježíííš používej ježííín
37. Říkej, že tvoje náboženství je Emo a mezi tvoje záliby patří Emo a "cutting my wrist" (řezání zápěstí)
38. Tvař se, že znáš všechny Emo kapely a že jsi je poslouchal, ještě než se staly známými
39. Nauč se přesvědčivě říkat frázi: "Já vyjadřuji své pocity."
40. Kup si podkolenky, opasek, kšiltovku a náramek se vzorem šachovnice
41. Aspoň jednou se pokus o sebevraždu (nepřežen to, aby se nestalo, že zemřeš!!!), povolený způsob je podřezání žil... jiné nepřicházejí v úvahu
42. Řež si něčím ostrým do ruky v místě, kde máš náramky, ale nesnaž se nějak moc, aby ti zakrývaly jizvy
43. Piš smutné básně o čemkoliv, například o Emo chlapcích z VF
44. Nos kšiltovky sk8 značek, sk8 trička a všechno co souvisí se sk8em
45. Máš zlomené srdce za každých okolností
46. Poslouchej My Chemical Romance, From First to Last, Hawthorne Heights, JAMISONPARKER, Blink 182, Awa, Fall out boy, Senses Fail
47. Při elektronické komunikaci používej co nejvíc Emo ikonek
48. Místo hahahaha piš spíš hhhh
49. Pravidlo č. 13.......... 2x si stříkni do očí repelent a mysli na děti v Africe
50. Holky se snaž sbalit tím, že jim budeš říkat, že jsi gay a že máš krásného přítele
51. Potom řekni, že "ona" je ta nejkrásnější žena, kterou jsi kdy potkal
52. Tvař se, že kvůli ní se s ním rozejdeš
53. Když se fotíš a netrefíš si foťákem hlavu, tvař se, že tak to mělo být... protože to je Emo
54. Všechny kapely, co posloucháš, musí mít toho stejného stylistu
55. Jako životní cíl si dej něco, co je dopředu jasně nesplnitelné... když budeš mít nesplnitelný sen, budeš na lidi působit víc Emo
56. Každý týden se foť a dávej si profily na MS, VF... stále aktuální fotku
57. Všude, kde to lidi vidí, piš "comment my new pics"
58. Samozřejmě nezapomeň na pravidlo číslo 13.
zdroj: magazin.cz
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